Philodendron 'Painted Lady' | Pretty Cool

I know. Walmart has these for super cheap. Here’s the thing though. They’re crammed into a tiny pot and not doing the best, right?r Also, they’re probably pretty dark by now, given the delightful overhead fluorescence provided by your local Wally World. Not only that, you’re gonna get it home and it’s going to freak out. Ask me how I know.

These, on the other hand, have been separated, acclimated (e.g. babied through their version of the tweenage years), and trained on a hoop. I did it initially because the hoop saved me some space. I kept up with it because it looks pretty cool. 

Sort of as previously mentioned - the better the light, the better the “neon” look you get from these girlies. On the hoop, you’ll for sure have to keep an eye on it to keep training it. They grow pretty quickly, and the stems get woody the longer they sit. So, for a little while at least, plan on checking it bi-weekly and turning the stem, then taping it/tying it to the trellis.

But what do I do when the trellis is full?!?!?!? I mean, I’m not the boss of you or anything, but if it were me, I’d cut the top off of it, prop it in water, and make yourself a new plant. When it outgrows the liner it’s in, you have the option of just up-potting or of up-potting both the plant and the trellis.

As far as you know, this plant could be your next two or three plants. You’ve just gotta give one a chance.

This plant is currently living in a 3.5" clear liner to accommodate its luscious root system with a 15" bamboo hoop. It’s potted in my signature 'Not Dirt' substrate—I won't sell the mix to you because it’s a hot mess to make, but the plants clearly love the drama of it.

I’ve vetted these beauties to ensure they’re healthy and happy, but I can’t guarantee what they’ll do once they leave my greenhouse. If I could control nature, I’d be a wizard, and I’d probably have a much cooler hat. 🧙‍♂️